


The Dichotomy of Relationships

by mcgarrygirl78



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Drama, F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-17
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-06-02 19:34:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,710
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6579568
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mcgarrygirl78/pseuds/mcgarrygirl78
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Little did she know how lost the Bartlet Administration would be without her.  Toby loved her; Sam was smitten with her; and it was quite possible that Josh would take a bullet for her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Dichotomy of Relationships

CJ poked her upper half out of the roof do Leo’s SUV. They were parked in the driveway of the Manchester house, ready to drive back to DC.

"Josh?"

"Yeah?"

"Grab me a bottle of water for the road?" she asked.

Josh jogged into the house; Leo bumped into him on the way out.

"Hey you!" Leo called out to CJ. "In the car or out of it…you can't have it both ways."

"But I like it both ways. Where is Sam?"

"They’re all going back on Air Force One. An eight hour ride did not appeal to them."

"OK. Make sure you have your cell phone Leo."

He nodded as Josh came out of the house. A bottle of water whizzed past him and CJ caught it.

"Six points and the touchdown for Cregg!" Josh exclaimed.

CJ danced before sliding down into her seat. Josh went around to the open window. All weekend they had been in a huddle, and as much as CJ loved him it surprised her that Josh was the one she could talk to right now.

"Toby will come around, you know that right?" Josh asked.

CJ shrugged, she knew nothing of the sort. A little over a month had passed since CJ and Leo announced their relationship to members of Senior Staff. The President was still out of the loop…Leo was trying to find a way to tell him. Josh had been surprised but accepting; Sam was his usual supportive self; and Donna had been overjoyed. Toby decided to protest by only talking to CJ and Leo when necessary. He never came flat out and said he hated the idea, but his behavior gave him away.

"I really thought you would be the hold out." CJ said.

"Me?" Josh asked. "Why?"

"Because of the dichotomy of our relationship and your relationship to Leo. Am I making any sense?"

"You know how much I love you." He said, all of the Josh smugness gone from his voice. "You are going to make him whole and happy again. How can I be against that?"

"How can Toby?" CJ asked.

"Do you want honesty or a shrug?" Josh asked.

"What do you think?"

"He is playing the role of the spurned suitor. If you are with Leo he doesn’t have a chance in hell."

CJ laughed. She looked at Josh and laughed right in his face.

"A chance, Toby? Joshua, I think you have gone completely around the bend. He stills wears his wedding ring and Andi left him before he came to rescue me from California. I think you're way off base mi amour."

"Yeah." Josh replied. "You're probably right. He’s impossible to read anyway."

Leo got into the car, slamming the door.

"Josh, back up or get hit. Buckle it Claudia Jean." He did not seem to be in a good mood.

CJ looked at him; his hazel eyes were dark.

"In a minute." She said in her calm, rational voice. She used it when she knew he was angry. CJ leaned out the window to kiss Josh’s cheek.

"See you in DC." She said.

"Drive safe, and try not to kill each other."

CJ smirked, buckling up.

"Oh ye of little faith."

They tore out of the driveway and onto the road. CJ looked at him.

"Are you going to tell me what happened or pretend that everything is fine?" she asked.

Leo said nothing but she noticed that his grip on the steering wheel was tight.

"You were in the house for approximately five minutes…what happened?"

Again there was silence. CJ took a deep breath, leaned over and kissed his cheek. She gently nipped his earlobe.

"CJ, I’m driving, are you trying to end up in a ditch?"

"I am trying to make you feel better." She replied.

A small smile crossed his lips.

"Aha." She whispered. "I see a bit of a smile there."

Leo took a quick look at her.

"Only you." He said.

CJ really did not need him to elaborate.

"I don’t really want to talk about being upset." Leo said. "Is that OK?"

CJ liked to talk about things…she liked to talk about everything. It was hard for him most of the time but he did it. He never wanted her to be upset or unhappy.

"Its fine with me." CJ replied. "This is an eight hour ride though and I refuse to let you be a grump. Are we understood?"

"Yes ma’am. There are CDs in the glove box if you want music." He said.

CJ popped it and leafed through the contents. There was plenty of Charlie Parker, Cassandra Wilson, and Ella Fitzgerald. An eight-hour ride serenaded by jazz would put her to sleep.

"Leo?"

"Yeah?"

"There is a gun in here." She said.

"Yeah. It is registered. I thought you knew about that."

"I did not. What is it doing in there?"

"I can't have it in the hotel. Did you find something to listen to?"

"No offense honey, but jazz makes me sleepy."

"No rock allowed." Leo said simply.

It was not as if he did not like rock. He liked the Beatles, the Stones, and some of the Who. It just was not his type of music. If it wasn’t jazz Leo liked Motown and Sinatra.

"Like what?" CJ asked.

"I don’t know…some of the things you listen to are horrible. The Clash, David Bowie, that guy who whines about no one loving him."

CJ smiled.

"I think you mean Morrissey, and that was just a moody college phase." She reached between her legs for her backpack.

"Can we agree on James Taylor?" she asked.

"Yeah."

She slipped the CD in and sat back. They were on I-93 now, going at a good clip. The I-495 merge was five miles away. Leo stole another glance at her.

"What?" CJ asked.

"Nothing. Did you have a good weekend?"

The senior staff spent the weekend at the Manchester house whittling names down to a short list for the next Associate Justice of the US Supreme Court.

"We were successful in some of the things we wanted to accomplish, but I would not call it good."

"Why not?" Leo asked.

"How about because I saw you for a combined total of 45 minutes in three days. Since you decided that the time was not right to tell the President I had to sleep in Zoey’s room all alone. You didn’t even sneak in."

"We were not having sex in the Manchester house." Leo said.

CJ rolled her eyes.

"Anyway, you could have come to me." He reasoned.

"Right…the River Jordan separated us. If we would have been at home I wouldn’t have had to find alternative means of pleasure."

Leo was looking at her again.

"Yes?" she asked.

"Don’t even joke about that Claudia Jean. Did you really…?"

"Of course I did. I was so far away from civilization no one heard me."

"I need to be there whenever you do that again CJ. I cannot stress enough the importance of my being there."

There was silence, which CJ's laughter pierced. She had a good long laugh.

"If you just tell the President I won't be forced to…"

"I am going to tell him as soon as we pick a Justice from the short list. If you don’t mind I would once again like to turn the conversation to alternative means of pleasure." He said.

"You’re a dirty old man Leo McGarry." She replied.

That made him laugh. He reached across and caressed her hand, slipping his fingers between hers.

"Are you afraid of a negative reaction?" she asked. "From the President I mean."

The President’s reaction was a big concern for Leo but he was not sure if he wanted CJ to know that. All he could think of was Jed’s reaction to the news of Jenny walking out on him. He made it seem as if Leo was a big idiot who could not do anything right. He did not want to open up CJ to any criticism from the President.

The age difference was also a concern, though strangely enough it didn’t seem to bother CJ in the least. Other than the dirty old man reference, which was a joke, she never talked about the nearly two decades between them. They would have to eventually…the deeper Leo fell he started to think of a more permanent situation.

"Answer me Leo." CJ said.

"No." not quite a lie. "It is just hard for me because of the dichotomy of our relationship. As the President of the United States I feel he should be aware of a personal relationship developing within the senior staff. However, as my friend I am not ready to reveal something that personal to him. You know him; once he knows something he will involve himself. It is his personality."

"Yeah." CJ hit the volume on Fire and Rain. They were quiet as Leo paid attention to the road and CJ mouthed the lyrics.

"Are you hungry?" Leo asked.

CJ shook her head. She had eaten a big breakfast knowing they would be on the road for eight hours. She figured she wouldn’t have to eat again until at least somewhere near New York. She was still holding his hand; it was a comfort. When was she going to reveal that her feelings for him had gone from light to serious? She kept remembering how he told her he would catch her if she fell. Did he really mean that, or was it just something that men say?

Leo McGarry was not some regular old person. He was not like the other Gomers that she had encountered in her recent past, as Josh lovingly called them. He listened to her when she talked, seemed to understand her witty and dry sense of humor, and always made her feel beautiful. They even had a few bickering matches, what couple didn’t, but they were nothing serious.

They just seemed to fit together…a fact that still blew CJ’s mind. She couldn’t spend too much time thinking about it because it was unexplainable. Fate, kismet, the hand of God, something like that was involved when it came to the entire relationship.

"Something is on your mind." Leo said.

A steady rain was falling now; Leo slowed down to 65. CJ thought he could go a bit faster but said nothing. It didn’t matter to her if the ride took forever…unless they hit gridlock. Leo was unbearable in gridlock.

"You're deflecting." She replied.

He smiled.

"I am not. We have a long ride and I am a good listener."

She looked at him, lifting his hand to her lips. Leo was a good listener and he found recently that CJ Cregg played the role of confident, self-assured feminista to a tee. It was not a falsehood, just a mask. She was the lead actress in an all-male show; when she made mistakes or felt that she was out of the loop, there were no allies. Her own wits were her best friends.

Little did she know how lost the Bartlet Administration would be without her. Toby loved her; Sam was smitten with her; and it was quite possible that Josh would take a bullet for her. Leo was the luckiest of them all because she loved him…at least he thought she might. When she held him in her arms Leo McGarry was home. He could talk to her, laugh with her, and making love to her left him speechless. He was not supposed to get a second chance of this caliber.

"I think we should stop for gas." Leo said.

They were getting ready to merge with I-91.

"This monstrosity is a gas guzzler." CJ replied.

"Thank you Peanut Gallery."

She told him to hit a full serve; she did not want to let his hand go. Leo nodded, saying he would stop near New Haven.

"Do you want to see Yale?" Leo asked.

"Not in the rain. Someday though." CJ pulled her knees to her chest.

"Yeah. The rain slowed us down a bit, not that I’m complaining. You sure you don’t want to tell me what’s on your mind?"

"Of course I want to tell you. Hell Leo, I want to tell you everything." She said.

That made him smile.

"I am glad to hear that. You can you know."

"I don’t know if I agree 100% with the good listener bit. I would never hold it against you because you hear enough."

"Still, I want to listen to you."

"I know. I’m OK honey really. I am tired and a bit frustrated. I’m being possessive and it bothers me."

"Are you? CJ, I don't think you have a possessive bone in your body."

"He should know Leo. I shouldn’t have to pretend I don’t have feelings for you whenever he is around. We are supposed to tell him so we don’t have to run around like we’re doing something clandestine…something wrong."

"I know. I promise to tell him after…"

"Tomorrow Leo. His reaction is not going to be any different six weeks from now. I know that you are one of his oldest friends and I serve at the pleasure of the President, but our personal lives are just that."

"OK, I will tell him tomorrow. I promise."

She nodded.

"Feel better?" he asked.

"Yes." She leaned to kiss his cheek. "I want a kiss."

"As soon as we stop for gas I will give you a thousand." He said.

Leo pulled into the gas station, rolling down the window.

"Yes sir?"

"Fill it with Silver Premium."

"Cash or credit sir?"

"Credit." Leo handed him the Platinum Amex card.

Sometimes CJ wondered just how much Leo was worth. She knew he had not been born wealthy but those in the know that he was rolling in it had alluded to it repeatedly. Even the President had made a vague reference to it when the subject was 10 million dollars. They had not been together long enough for CJ to think asking was appropriate.

Leo unstrapped himself and leaned over to her. CJ met him halfway.

"I hated not being with you this weekend." He said.

Their first kiss was soft and tender. CJ stroked the nape of his neck as she always did; Leo moaned against her mouth. CJ pulled away for a breath and then dove back in. This time there was more passion, more longing. There seemed to be a mountain between them…Leo hated the damned SUV. In the Buick she’d be in his lap by now. CJ edged closer on her seat; Leo caressed her back. Then his lips moved down to her neck, that long beautiful neck. He planned to adorn it with diamonds, many diamonds. CJ smiled at the feeling of his lips…it felt like an eternity passed since they last touched.

"Mr. McGarry…excuse me Mr. McGarry?"

Leo turned to look out the window. The attendant handed him the receipt to sign. He did, and handed it back.

"Thank you sir."

Leo pulled around and parked the car. They both went into the bathroom, which always seemed to be clean in New England gas stations. Then CJ stretched her legs by going into the store to buy a Coke for Leo and a flavored water for herself. Back on the road she smiled at him.

"Sometimes you're amazing." She said.

"Just sometimes?"

"Yes. If it makes you feel better you're a good kisser all the time."

Leo looked at her while switching lanes on 91.

"I always give 100% to worthy causes." He replied.

James Taylor went around again; Leo and CJ made Your Smiling Face a duet. He never used to do that, sing, and now it was something he looked forward to doing. Just another way, in a few short months, that CJ Cregg changed his life for the better. She reached out and caressed his thigh. His natural chemical reaction embarrassed Leo.

"Hey Leo?"

"Hey Claudia Jean?"

"Have you ever gotten a blowjob while driving?" she asked.

"I have not. I would really like to but I am going to have to turn you down for the safety of everyone on I-91. Maybe when we get to a safe DC road."

CJ nodded, creeping her hand along until her fingers found the zipper to his khakis. Leo looked at her.

"As much as I want to beg you not to do that…I find that I cannot." He said.

"I’m not doing anything." She replied.

"Yes you are." Leo adjusted in his seat. "You're going to kill us both."

"What a lovely way to go." CJ said.

"Except that your dick will not be hanging out of your pants. You're out of your mind if you think that won't make the New York Times. That is not how I plan to have the world find out about us."

CJ laughed, still toying with his zipper. She wanted him and the kissing in the gas station only made her hotter. Three days of not being affectionate nearly drove her insane. The President was always around and if he wasn’t Leo was afraid he was lurking. CJ’s cell phone rang, disturbing the moment. She looked at the display and sighed.

"Hey Toby." She said.

"Do you have a few moments to talk?" he asked.

"If this is about work then no because Leo and I did not get any alone time this weekend."

"It’s not about work." Toby muttered.

"Well, what is it? Oh God Toby, is everyone OK?"

Leo looked at her with concern in his eyes.

"We’re fine. I just need to talk to you CJ. Maybe I shouldn’t have called."

"If you feel that way then hang up." She said.

"Why do you have to make this so difficult?" he asked.

"You're kidding right? You’ve been the world’s largest ass since I told you about Leo and me. Now I am supposed to be grateful because you want to mutter some lame apology. You have got to do better than that Toby."

"I’m hanging up now." Toby said, his temper beginning to flare.

"Good, don’t call back until you come up with something better."

"Dammit CJ! How the hell did you expect me to react? You tell me you're fucking Leo and I am supposed to throw a ticker tape parade!"

"No, you are supposed to be my supportive best friend."

"How is ever supposed to work?" he asked.

"The same way you and I would have if it were us." CJ replied before hanging up.

She hated the fact that you could not slam a cell phone. A slamming telephone really let the other party know that you meant business. Leo was quiet for a while, focusing on the road. He knew if CJ wanted to talk about it then she would.

"I hate fighting with him but he is wrong." She said.

"I know. Don’t torture him baby. If he comes with the usual shoddy Toby apology just take it and move on. He loves you."

"It is not enough this time Leo. He said some cruel things to me…things that are out of his character."

"Do you want me to kick his ass?" Leo asked.

That wasn’t going to be necessary; Toby would come around eventually. They slowed down, the rain had caused a bit of a jam near the exit to I-95. The longest leg of the trip was still ahead. CJ moved her seat back to stretch her legs. Then she found her way back to his zipper. She toyed with it but didn’t move it down. Leo smiled.

"CJ, I..."

"What?"

"I…" he cleared his throat and again adjusted in his seat. "I am so glad that you decided to drive to DC with me."

"Me too. I figured it was the only way we would get any time together out of this trip. Can I ask you something slightly uncomfortable?"

"My slight discomfort has never stopped you before." Leo said.

CJ bit her lip, a look of introspection on her face.

"I certainly don’t want to jump the gun Leo, and I know that this conversation might be premature, but…I think it is starting to turn serious." She said.

"I think you're right. What’s your question?"

"Is that OK?"

"Well, I certainly did not ask you out so we could have some fleeting sexual infatuation. At the same time, a deeper commitment is some time off. We may decide that we don’t want that."

Leo could not bring himself to say the word marriage in her presence right now. It was too early for that word but he thought of it countless times.

"Yeah." CJ said.

"Did I say the wrong thing?" he asked.

"No Leo, I think you hit the nail on the head. It sounded fine to me."

"Good. You know CJ, I am not always good at expressing myself. OK, I am really horrible at it. You have to bear with me because I don’t want to be that way with you ever."

"You're not." CJ replied. "Except that you wouldn’t tell me what happened…"

"I love you." Leo cut her off.

CJ turned to look at him. He had to keep his eyes on the road but he felt her blue eyes burning a hole through him.

"I don’t think I heard you right." She said.

"You heard me right."

"Say it again anyway."

Leo took a moment to look at her.

"I love you Claudia Jean Cregg. I couldn’t hold it in anymore because you deserve to know how much you mean to me."

"I love you too Leo. I love you so much."

She kissed the side of his mouth, wishing she could do more. Suddenly CJ wished they were naked in her bed or curled up on the couch of his hotel suite. She sighed.

"You know, I feel as if a two ton weight was lifted from my stomach." Leo said.

"Yeah."

"Tomorrow I’m going to walk into the Oval Office and tell the President of the United States that I love you."

***


End file.
